Motivational speakers vex employees

Employers planning to boost staff morale by bringing in motivational speakers might be disappointed to find that such measures can be no more effective than an animated pep talk from David Brent, the inept manager from the TV series The Office.

A survey to mark the launch of TV channel Dave’s Best Part-time Job In The World showed that staff were vexed by so called ‘meaningless’ perks, such motivational talks and dress down days.

The survey revealed that ‘half-hearted’ attempts at boosting office morale also figured in the top ten office irritations, with forced socials, employee of the month and tea trolleys all being cited as useless initiatives.

When asked why these perks annoyed people, 36% said that they would prefer the company to spend the money on staff instead of ‘silly motivational schemes’.

A quarter of the workforce ( 26%) felt that the company was only doing it to distract them from the fact the employers was not paying out bonuses and pay rises, where as 15% of staff found the schemes distracting.

The report also indicated that morale was at an all time low with 47% of the 2,000 respondents saying that they would leave work if it was not for the poor economic climate.

Meanwhile, blocked printers, poor technology and the increased use of corporate jargon were other causes of irritation.

Staff described going to work in the dark and coming home in the dark as the Dracula shift.†

Interestingly some staff even felt they needed to fake the need for the toilet and take what they described as a Chinese holiday – a five minute break sitting on a china loo.†

Other workplace slang included ‘flasturbation’ – a self-congratulatory and excessive use of animation in presentations and ‘Poping it’, which refers to someone losing the real argument during a meeting, to take the moral high ground.

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